Puppy Love

Last night, Savannah and I stayed over at a lady's house to take care of her 4 dogs. I decided to take her dog, Annie, for a walk (run) this morning.

Annie's this crazy, energetic red hound dog pup. She's in that awkward, annoying stage where she's not quite a puppy and not quite an adult. She's big and awkward and trips over herself, and trips everyone else with her. She doesn't quite know what's expected of her as a dog yet, and she doesn't know the exact appropriate way to love people yet. She jumps all over you and crowds your space and slobbers all over your face. She was jumping all over my and wouldn't leave me alone this morning. She was in dire need of some attention, so I decided to take her for a walk. She went wild. She likes to zigzag all over the place and trip you and gets excited over biting dirt mounds, and she'll bolt off running in the direction of butterflies flittering by. She has a short leash, and pulls against it with all her might to go explore more of this world that I've taken her into out of the comfort of her home. We finally turned onto the road that leads back to her home, and so since we were close, I decided to take her off her leash and trust that she wouldn't run off too far. So I took it off, and she still stayed close. Then she looked behind her and realized that she wasn't on the leash anymore. She got excited and went a bit farther than she would if she were still in the leash. She would run then come back to my side, then run off again and come right back, not going far. I called her name once, and she happily bounded back to my side and stayed there. She now had complete freedom and yet she loved the fact that she could explore yet stay with me.

That's when Papa God really got ahold of my heart. As I was watched Annie enjoying her new freedom, He spoke to me and He asked me "how long do you really want your leash to be?" And I stop, slightly perplexed, and ask "what do you mean Papa?" He answers me, gently and graciously, as He always does. He answers me and He tells me that there's a short leash on me. A leash that not He, but I have put on myself and handed Him to hold to keep me away when I get to close to danger. And he whipsers "will you let me take your leash off? I want to give you freedom." And I say "but Papa, that's dangerous, Annie might run off and get hit by a car or get lost, then what would I do? I might do the same thing if you take this leash off..." And in my spirit I hear "Love always TRUSTS. Love Always HOPES." And Papa shows me the beauty of Annie. He shows me that in the same way I trusted and hoped in her and let her off her leash for a bit, He wants to do the same for me, because He trusts and hopes in me. Papa tells me that in the same way Annie realized her freedom and bounded off to enjoy it, yet coming back and came to the sound of my voice, He wants to give me the same. He has taken me out of my home, has taken me out into the middle of beauty and new things to explore and discover, and He wants to take me off my leash and give me complete freedom to explore and run and taste and see the wonderful things He has created around me. I thought He'd be scared to let me off my leash because like the pup, I can act wrecklessly and compulsively, but He tells me He trusts me, He hopes in me, because He loves me. 

Papa shows me Annie's beauty, and our likeness. Like Annie, sometimes I can come off awkward or crazy, because I'm just learning what it looks like to love people, and I don't quite into the expectations of what or how people are used to being loved. Sometimes I trip over myself, and slobber, and invade people's space with my need to love, and to be loved. I get excited over silly things that seem to matter to no one but myself. I like to play in the dirt and get myself into situations that maybe aren't the safest. I'm not always what people expect of me, and neither is Annie. One day she'll learn the commands, and she'll know when and how love and attention is acceptable. But Papa shows me the beauty in Annie, and the beauty in me. He shows me that she has a thirst to kiss and chase and love with NO bounds or restrictions whatsoever. She chases beautiful things with every expectation of catching them. She knows what it looks like to be free, and yet come at her master's voice. She drives you crazy, but you can't help but love her, and she leaves footprints on your heart. 

And that is the beauty and freedom Papa wants to give me. Where the spirit of the Lord is, there is FREEDOM. He wants to unhook my lease, and watch me as I love in ways that invade people's privacy, not because that's a bad thing, but because people just aren't being loved so fiercely. He wants to watch me as I chase beautiful things with every expectation of catching them, and because I'm not on a leash, I will! He wants to watch me as I run and smile and dance and explore within the confines of His freedom, where He'll be right by my side every step of the way, and where I don't wander far, but come at the sound of His voice. I may not fit into expectations, social norms, and I may come off as crazy. But if I live anything less than wild, fierce, and free, I'll never know or taste the beauty and freedom that comes outside of my comfort zone. Like Annie, I choose to love, explore, and expect great things no matter what or how others receive, because I know my master, and He's not just my master. Like a dog, I'm my masters best friend, not just a pet!

I'm not sure what this freedom looks like. For so long I've been scared to let myself off the hook, to explore, to step out and trust that Papa will still be right there should trouble come along, or should I find something amazing to share with Him:) All I know is that we are called into the freedom of Christ, and I seek to find out what that looks like in my own life. What does it look like in yours? Love always HOPES. Love always TRUSTS. Love will set you FREE and never let you down.

And maybe like Annie, just maybe, I'll leave footprints of love on your heart too.